If you are engaging in self-harming behaviors, you may be doing so because you feel intense emotional pain and feel as though you have no other outlet.

But you can feel better and stop your self-harmful behaviors.

Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) has proven to be very effective when it comes to ending self-harmful behaviors. With DBT, you can learn skills that will help you to better regulate your emotions and find healthy ways to cope with pain.

If you are harming yourself through methods such as cutting, you can use emotion regulation DBT skills to better manage your emotions. Remember that emotions are normal and everyone experiences them. But sometimes the distress can feel very overwhelming and difficult to manage.

DBT Skills: Emotion Regulation

Emotion regulation DBT skills help you see a link in the cycle connecting thoughts, behaviors, and feelings.

Here are three ways to use emotion regulation skills to stop self-harmful behaviors:

1. Practice the Opposite Action. Some researchers have shown that emotions cause a response in our bodies. For example, if you are angry about something, you might attack. If you are sad, you might withdraw, and if you are fearful, you might run away.

One emotion regulation DBT skill for self-harm is to commit to your opposite action. Where you might normally attack if you are angry, you would instead make a concerted effort to identify the emotion you feel, understand the action, and then commit to doing the opposite. In this instance, instead of attacking, you would avoid the situation and be kind.

Doing the opposite of what you would normally do is soothing because it will help you feel the opposite of what you are feeling right now. Even something like watching a funny video on the Internet or listening to an upbeat pop song will provide the “opposite action” to pull you from your self-harm.

2. Apply Acronyms. Dialectical Behavior Therapy teaches the use of acronyms to help you remember and practice important skills.

One helpful acronym is called “PLEASE MASTER,” and it provides the tools you need to regulate your emotions. You would commit to treating any “Physical iLlness;” “Eat” healthy food; “Avoid” alcohol, drugs, or anything mood-altering; “Sleep” well; “Exercise;” and then “MASTER” something that gives you a sense of achievement or ability.

Another helpful acronym is “STOPP,” which stands for “Stop and Step Back” (in your mind), “Take” a breath and notice your breath move in and out, “Observe” what are you thinking and feeling, “Pull” back and try to imagine that you are an outside observer, and finally “Practice” what works by asking yourself how you feel after this STOPP dialog and what is best for you in your situation. The steps described in this acronym provide a quick and easy window into the DBT practice.

3. Manipulate an Image. If you feel led to harm yourself based on a distressing image, such as a memory or something you saw or imagined that you can’t get out of your head, try either of these tips:

First, you can imagine putting the image on a monitor. Take your imaginary mouse and make the image smaller, change the colors to black and white, and mute the sound you might associate with the image. Continue making the image smaller until it is microscopic.

You can also try to imagine a piece of thick clear plastic that you put between your face and the image. Imagine yourself pushing the image away, through the glass, until the image is small and far away.

If you have the urge to self-harm, try using these emotion regulation DBT skills. Of course, if you are in danger of harming yourself, always seek professional or emergency help. Reaching out to someone is always an option.