DOING DIFFERENTLY

Changing what we normally do can greatly affect they way we feel and think. 

When you look at your ‘Vicious Cycle’ form where you wrote down your thoughts, feelings (emotions and physical sensations) and behaviours, notice particularly what you wrote for ‘behaviours’.  Very often we react automatically, without considering our actions or the consequences of them.

• What helped you cope and get through it?
• What didn’t I do or what did I avoid doing?
• What automatic reactions did I have?
• What would other people have seen me doing?
• What were the consequences of what I did?  What happened later because of it?  Did it affect the way I felt later?

Now ask yourself, what could I have done differently? 

• What would someone else have done in that situation?  (it might help to think about particular people that you know, and what they might have done differently)
• Have there been times in the past when I would have done something else?
• If I had paused, and taken a breath, what would I have done?

Write down several options that you might have done differently if it had occurred to you, then ask yourself:

• If I had tried that, how would the situation have been different?
• How would it have affected what I felt?
• How would it have affected what I thought?
• Would it have been more helpful or effective for me, another person or for the situation?
• What would the consequences have been of doing something differently?

Learn to face your fears by using graded exposure to overcome avoidance.