The song comes on and I don’t know how to explain it.
I’m not suffocating.
I’m not breathless.
I just can’t breath.
The song that I would replay over and over.
How can I feel numb but feel everything terrible all at once?
I feel so weighed down.
Like functioning would take years.
If I let them know I feel this way the pills stop.
My skin feels like it’s burning but I’m shivering and on the inside I am ice.
I’m just staring now.
At the wall.
Willing myself to feel nothing.
A whole year.
I’m still not past it.
I feel sick.
I feel afraid.
I feel tired and anxious.
God why did this just hit me so suddenly?